It is true, I was a punk ass kid. By the time I was thirteen my parents had divorced and I had very little parental supervision. In a lot of ways it is a miracle that my brothers and I did not end up in jail.Looking back though I have had a number of male "father figures" that were looking out for me that at the time, I didn't even realize. There are a number of lessons that I have incorporated into my own life from these people that took it upon themselves to set me on a path to become a productive member of society. In a sense to become a man. I continue to make mistakes, I continue to develop judgement through experience. But the foundation these men have set down for me gave me a stable platform to build on.
My Grandfather, a Car Salesman, a Corporal and a Lawyer.
My paternal grandfather was a wiry thin man, a story teller and a family man. Our family went through a lot of turmoil and trials from my mother passing away when I was very young to the divorce of my father and my stepmother. Though I do not have memories of all of these events, I did have photographs and of course the yarns that my grandpa would spin. It seems that every event that took place in our family, good or bad, there was grandpa and his graceful presence. He worked hard and loved his family. Grandpa would often drop pearls of wisdom down to me as I grew into adulthood. One of the many that has stuck with me is this: "If you fall asleep by the time your head hits the pillow, you have worked hard enough". I work hard everyday and sleep like a baby because of it.
During my teen years I would often flee the chaotic scene of my own home and stay at my friend's house. My friend's stepfather Steve was an amazing man. Having been a welder in the U.S. Navy, Steve with his high school education started a career working at car dealerships doing repairs. Quickly it seems Steve was a mechanic, then moved to become a salesman, then the owner of a dealership, then a few dealerships and then Steve became the President of the North American Automobile Dealers Association! For no reason I saw, he took me into his home and treated me like I was his own son. I look back now and I realize that Steve probably saw a young man that needed guidance and direction. When you would ask Steve about his hard work and determination to rise during his career he would simply reply with one of his many rules for life. The one that seemed to be his favorite was: "Life is a cinch by the inch, but hard by the yard". I make it a rule to make goals that I can achieve, clearing one hurdle at a time.
When I landed with Bravo Battery, 1st Battalion, 10th Marines at Camp Lejeune, North Carolina as an 18 year old I found lots of people that could take me in one direction or another. Fortunately, by that time in my life I had learned the value of a good male role model. Corporal Watkins was always immaculate in appearance, carried himself with a ramrod straight bearing and was the most skilled person I have met at their job. Watkins was a radio operator and I was a forward observer so we often interacted throughout my career and we traveled around the world with our unit. I will never forget the morning in Okinawa during a physical training session when we were preparing for our physical fitness test that was coming up. A Marine has to do twenty pull-ups to achieve a perfect score on the physical fitness test. I was getting close to twenty and I was growing tired when Corporal Watkins said to me, "You don't quit when you are tired. You quit when you are done". There is work to be done in life and there is satisfaction in seeing a job completed.
Finally, I have been very blessed to have my partner Rebecca's father Pete in my life. Pete is a lawyer by trade and worked very hard for years at the Department of Interior. Now retired in his 70s I have watched Pete immerse himself in a number of adventures from sailing, to rebuilding a 1973 VW Karmann Ghia engine to taking math classes through the Kahn Academy. Pete has welcomed me into his family and loved me like a son for over seven years now. The thing that has impressed me though is Pete's level of fitness. Pete exercises every day and once explained it to me this way, "I am afraid that if I stop, I won't start up again!" As a man of 44 years I realize that I am blessed with good health and that daily fitness is essential. Pete's example has shown that by continuing to exercise I can remain active later and have a very high quality of life even at an older age.
The Workout of the Day (We have traveled home for the holidays and will be modifying our daily workout a bit. Each exercise is done for three sets)
Dumbbell Chest Press
Suspension Strap Chest Flies
Weighted Push-ups
Suspension Strap Biceps Curls
Alternating Biceps Curls
Concentration Dumbbell Curls
Abdominal Work
2-mile dog walk with a 35 lbs. day pack
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